I think I was about 13 when I first met Becky T. We must’ve met at school, but for the life of me, I can’t recall the circumstances. Either way, we were both at the beginning of that great adventure – High School!!
Looking back now we were two awkward young girls trying to find our way. Somehow along the way we found each another. Thus began a friendship that I treasured.
Becky was the eldest of four children, and although I lived with my Grandparents, I was the eldest of four children too. (This was to change, as my mother went on and had four more babies!!)
Becca - 1976
Shelley - 1976
Becca - 1 Year Old
Becca - 2 Years Old
Becca - 4 Years Old
Becca - 5 Years Old
Becca - 3 Years Old
PS. Becca will be 6 this Wednesday!
Along with her parents and siblings Becky lived on one side of the Fair Grounds in Simcoe, and I and my Grandparents lived on the other side.
My Mom and Papa liked Becky citing the fact that she was a good girl. And she was a good girl. (Still is.)
We walked home from school together almost every night. It was a straight line down Norfolk Street,
and then she would turn at South Drive, and I would carry on to my home. It seemed that no matter how many days we had like that, we never ceased to have things to talk about. Isn’t that the way it is with young girls though??
I have memories of sitting in her basement listening to her records which consisted primarily of “The Osmonds”. What’s amusing is that she has memories of sitting at my house listening to my collection of John Denver albums. Ah, the days of the LP. Scratchy and sometimes hollow sounding, I have to admit that I still own a number of them. Further, there are times that I long to hear John Denver sing the way that I first heard him…on my little brown record player.
I didn’t call her Becky in those days. I called her ‘Becca. I am almost certain that she hated it, but in the end, she did tolerate it. Still, I don’t remember anyone else who was allowed to call her that.
When most of our friends went to Woolworth’s after school for fries and such, Becky and I had another place that we would go. There was a little restaurant just across the road from Loblaws (the big grocery store in Simcoe) that was called Cordier’s. This was a most interesting place to visit. The owner, Mr. Cordier himself had it decorated in such a way that it resembled a flea market. He played darts as I recall, and he’d won dozens of trophies doing this. They lined shelf after shelf, along with photos of him accepting said trophies. If that wasn’t enough, there were a number of fake parrots and small dusty birds that stood lifeless on dusty perches. Cups and saucers, clocks shaped like fish and seashells adorned every inch of the walls. It was a feast for the eyes to be sure.
Although the décor lacked something, the aroma that met you as you walked in the door made up for it. Cordier’s made the best fish and chips around. Now they weren’t fries like you get today. No thin gaunt slivers of potatoes to be had here, no sirree bobby!! These were lovely meaty chips, fried to a golden brown. Mmm, I can almost taste them now.
After school though, and just a couple of hours before dinner was not a good time for us to be going for fish and chips. I can’t see either of our Moms standing for that!! What we did get was an order of coleslaw and a Coke. It was creamy and spicy and delicious. There we would sit, talking and growing up. It was a wonderful time in our lives.
We both worked at the local Dairy Queen which was possibly why we ate at Cordier’s!! She taught me how to say Detroit, because as she said, almost all Canadians say DE-troy-it. We went to school dances together, laughing and dancing until our heads ached. One dance in particular is memorable for both of us. It was the ‘50s Sock Hop. We both had bobby socks and full pleated skirts, and chewed gum all day at school. We were rebels. I think we both felt it would never end.
Being from the States, I knew that Becky might not always be there, but when you’re a teenager, those things don’t seem to take hold. One day however, she told me that her parents had made the decision to go back to the US. I remember the feeling I had inside. What would I do without my friend?? We would stay in contact, that’s all there was to it.
We said our goodbyes, and months went on. We wrote one another and our lives went in different directions. We both graduated, and then letters became fewer and fewer. Somewhere along the line, I lost her address and sadly I didn’t hear from her again.
Years went by, and I tried in vain to find my friend. I contacted high schools in the area where I knew she had been last. There were only dead ends. I never forgot my friend ‘Becca though.
Happily last December I received an email from Becky!! I couldn’t believe it. After all that time, there was this sweet note right in front of me. She wondered if I remembered her. I smiled and thought how silly she was. Of course I remembered her.
Last week, on my 44th birthday, my telephone rang. On the other end I heard the words, “Shelley, this is Becky.” It took 28 years, but I have my friend back. We talked for over an hour that day, catching up and reminiscing. Time changes some things, which it has in both of our lives. Other things however, do not change. True friendship, for example, endures.
Becky I am so glad to have you back in my life.
*~*~*
She’s five years old. “Almost six!!” she is quick to remind. She has a smile that can lift your heart and there isn’t one spot on her that isn’t ticklish.
Rebecca Anna. ‘Becca. ‘Becca Doodle Doo.
She thinks all clothes should be pink. She feels that one cannot own too many things Barbie. She knows how to melt her Daddy’s heart with just a smile. (As it should be.) She loves fruit roll ups, and grapes, and noodles.
One of her favorite songs is “God Bless the USA” by Lee Greenwood. There is a line in the chorus that says, “And I won’t forget the men who died, who gave that right to me”. ‘Becca changes it every time and sings
“And I won’t forget the men who died, who gave that life to me.” I think Mr. Greenwood would overlook this tiny change, don’t you??
She can do a perfect pushup. Her Poppy will be proud to see her form!! Back straight as an arrow and arms spaced just right!!
We recently found out that Rebecca has Celiac. Now for all of you that have never heard that term, it means that Rebecca is gluten intolerant, and that she can no longer have foods made with, or containing gluten. At first one would think this is a simple task. When you consider however, how many of the obvious foods contain gluten, your choices begin to dwindle. For instance, try eliminating bread, cookies, cakes, waffles, pancakes, muffins and cereal from your diet. Those are the obvious ones. Certain condiments such as soy sauce and tomato ketchup also contain gluten. Try telling a five year old who doesn’t really care for sweets that she can no longer have Goldfish. Frustrating.
Fortunately, there are substitutes such as rice flour and corn based cereals. They are not only costly, but they must be hunted down either at health food stores or online.
So far, this little one is taking things in stride. Well, almost all the time. Although dubious to try the substitutes, she’s getting there. She has a strong spirit, and heart…the kind of heart that will let her fly as high as an eagle. (She gets this from her Nanny. I’m sure of that.)
She likes being called ‘Becca, and she told me that she isn’t sure why she wasn’t just named ‘Becca instead of Rebecca because hardly anyone calls her Rebecca anyhow.
The other night, she stood watching me peel potatoes for french fries. “I don’t like the taste of rotting potatoes” she said. I was without words. She was staring at the potatoes I was peeling. “What??” I said. “You know, not cooked” she said. I laughed. “Do you mean raw potatoes??” I asked. “Oops, I goofed” ‘Becca laughed.
Dear ‘Becca,
I hope that you never lose that sense of wonder, that lovely innocence that defines you. Your sweet smile shows me how much you love life. Your laughter shows me just how much you enjoy life. Your spirit shows me that you will take life by the horns. I can’t wait to see
you soar as I know you will. Part of me can see that in you now. Another part of me wants to slow the days because they rush by so quickly.
Someday you will know what joy you’ve brought into my life. You are a precious Sweet Potato and I love you very much.
Love, Shelley
*~*~*
So, there you have it…The Tale of Two ‘Beccas. The first one found, lost and then found again, and the second happily found. Both…treasured.
Love from Butternut Grove,
Shelley
God Bless the USA
By Lee Greenwood
Copyright 1984
If tomorrow all the things were gone,
I’d worked for all my life.
And I had to start again,
with just my children and my wife.
I’d thank my lucky stars,
to be livin’ here today.
‘Cause the flag still stands for freedom,
and they can’t take that away.
And I’m proud to be an American,
where at least I know I’m free.
And I wont forget the men who died,
who gave that right to me.
And I gladly stand up,
next to you and defend her still today.
‘Cause there ain’t no doubt I love this land,
God bless the USA.
From the lakes of Minnesota,
to the hills of Tennessee.
Across the plains of Texas,
From sea to shining sea.
From Detroit down to Houston,
and New York to L.A.
Well there's pride in every American heart,
and its time we stand and say.
That I’m proud to be an American,
where at least I know I’m free.
And I wont forget the men who died,
who gave that right to me.
And I gladly stand up,
next to you and defend her still today.
‘Cause there ain’t no doubt I love this land,
God bless the USA.
And I’m proud to be and American,
where at least I know I’m free.
And I wont forget the men who died,
who gave that right to me.
And I gladly stand up,
next to you and defend her still today.
‘Cause there ain’t no doubt I love this land,
God bless the USA.
February 12, 2004
I’d always seen lists like this, but I’d never actually done one. It’s an interesting thing, to sit down and chronicle one hundred things about your own self.
Every little fact and detail is true. Many of them are fun facts, but in reality they paint a pretty darned good picture of who I am, and a lot of them are just little glances at very happy memories.
Love, Shelley
*PS – All references to my Aunt, Ginger are made in fun. She is a wonderful person, and I love her dearly.
One Hundred Things about Me
1.Although I live in the United States, I was born and raised in Canada.
2.I’m planning on becoming a US citizen one day, and I plan to wear red, white and blue for the ceremony!!
3.I spent the first seven years of my life living in a cemetery!! Hmm, I should clarify. My Papa was the caretaker there, and we lived in the house that the cemetery provided.
4.My middle name is Ginger*, after my Aunt.
5.My Mama always told me that if I’d been born a boy, she would have called me Dominic. Since that day, I’ve always been glad that I was a girl.
6.I love to sing. I don’t sing well, but I don’t believe that should ever stop one from singing.
7.My favorite dessert is Cherry Cheesecake, followed closely by Carrot Cake with Cream Cheese Frosting.
8.I am the eldest of eight children.
9.I played with Barbie dolls as a child, and it didn’t destroy my psyche.
10.My Aunt (Ginger*) teased me continually, and THIS may have destroyed my psyche.
11.I love to fish.
12.I still remember the first fish I ever caught. It was a Sunfish. To this day I can still see the smile on my Papa’s face.
13.I hate reality shows. I watched one of them for five minutes. If it taught me anything, it is that they are anything BUT reality!!
14.When I was a little girl, I wanted to be an archaeologist.
15.I’ve never figured out why they don’t make Banana Popsicles anymore. Sigh.
16.I can do a perfect turkey call. (Ask Cassandra or Rebecca)
17.I can do a perfect pig call too. (Ask Cassandra or Rebecca)
18.I am not so perfect on a sled anymore. (Ask Cassandra or Rebecca)
19.A Sunday drive in the country is one of the sweetest things.
20.I own more used books than I do “new” books.
21.Gladys Taber is my favorite American author.
22.Lucy Maud Montgomery is my favorite Canadian author.
23.I love the smell of a hockey arena in the winter.
24.If someone made me choose between the mountains or the sea, I would have to think long and hard.
25.Tea is the perfect beverage – hot in winter, and iced in summer.
26.My first official meal in New York was a hot dog at Yankee Stadium!!
27.I walked right into the line of fire during a game of horseshoes once. Boy, did I ever have a headache!!
28.I’ve seen all the episodes of “The Waltons” more times than I can count.
29.I have held an eagle on my arm.
30.I love old black and white movies.
31.I can watch a Christmas movie at any time of the year.
32.I cry at sad movies.
33.I cry at sad books too.
34.I love green olives, and can eat an unhealthy amount of them in one sitting.
35.Autumn is my very favorite time of the year.
36.The smell of the sea can make me cry.
37.I once fed two black bears Werther’s butterscotch candies. They loved them, and sat up like puppy dogs to get them.
38.I love to collect children’s story books.
39.I don’t think you should ever stop believing in Santa Claus.
40.When I was in high school, I was in love with Richard Thomas from The Waltons. I was devastated when I found out that he was married. Then, when I was married, he got divorced. Life is so cruel.
41.I didn’t go to Grade 4.
42.I love the sound of LP’s on a record player.
43.I once tried to catch a sparrow by sprinkling salt on its tail.
44.I believed everything that my Papa ever told me. (See #43)
45.I have raised three Saint Bernards. They are loving, and loyal and as gentle as lambs. Yes, they do slobber just as much as you thought.
46.I am less than 5 feet tall, coming in at 4 feet 11 ½ inches. I wrote 5 feet on my driver’s license.
47.My favorite flower in a bouquet is a carnation.
48.My favorite flower in the garden is cosmos.
49.I once saw a finback whale.
50.I believe in life after death.
51.I’ve crossed the Mississippi in three different states.
52.I’ve tripped going both up and down stairs.
53.I’ve been to the top of Mount Washington, but I didn’t walk or run to get there.
54.I love the smell of a tent on a cold night.
55.I have never smoked or done drugs.
56.Coke is better than Pepsi.
57.I used to be afraid of driving over water at night.
58.I love earrings.
59.When I was little, I believed that there was “something” under my bed. I have to say my Aunt Ginger* probably planted that idea there.
60.I wear glasses, but wish that I didn’t.
61.I want to own a Chocolate Lab one day, and call her Mattingly.
62.Erik introduced me to sushi. If it’s not too spicy, I really like it.
63.I’ve had two root canals in my life. I didn’t like either.
64.I am not a morning person, but I try to be.
65.I say P’khan not pee-can.
66.I wear a toe ring on each foot.
67.I watch too much Animal Planet, but I could be doing worse things with my time.
68.My favorite color M&M’s are the green ones. What is it about those green ones??
69.If my life were made into a movie, I would want Janeane Garofalo to play me. Perhaps it’s just because I like saying Janeane Garofalo.
70.I love thunderstorms in summer.
71.My chocolate chip cookies are the best. Seriously.
72.I still have my tonsils.
73.I miss kid’s cereal and cartoons on Saturday mornings.
74.I hate mice and rats and other rodentia. Now if they live outside and stay there, that’s fine.
75.I once killed a snake with a shovel.
76.I still get exited about my birthday.
77.I love family events.
78.I love getting my hair done.
79.I have lupus.
80.I don’t like yappy little dogs. You know the kind.
81.I make my 7’s with that funny little line through them. I like to pretend that I’ve been to Europe.
82.I love the music of Bing Crosby and Nat King Cole and Billie Holliday.
83.I have green eyes.
84.I love old Bela Lugosi movies, especially around Halloween.
85.I have no tattoos. I will never have tattoos.
86.I like oatmeal with brown sugar, not white. Papa taught me that.
87.I’ve never actually owned a car of my own.
88.The older I get the more I realize just how alarmingly little I know about everything.
89.I floss. Daily.
90.My Papa called me Skeeziks.
91.I am left-handed.
92.I have trouble telling a joke without laughing.
93.I love kiwi fruit.
94.I do English Smocking.
95.I make greeting cards.
96.Once when my Mom was kissing me, I told her not to breathe on me because she would tarnish my neck.
97.I’m not trendy, and probably never will be.
98.I believe that G-d has a plan for everything, but I also believe that He allows us to make choices.
99.I believe that I’m a better person because of the man who loves me. I love you Erik.
As the sun sets in the west, Scooter and I pause to look out the big bay window together. “Red sky at night…” I can hear my Papa say. The words echo in my mind and comfort me like a soft blanket about my shoulders. The sky is alight with the colors layering on the horizon. Red coral melts into rosy pink into blushed cream and then the
sky fades into the blue hues. I’ve often wondered how something like a sunset that lasts only minutes a day can permeate our memories and leave a lasting impression, one that can stay with us all of our lives.
I can recall sunsets; can see them in my mind. One in particular stands out today. I was five years old and Papa had taken me to the pier in Port Dover. It was the end of a hot summer day, and my Papa had put in more than a full day’s work as caretaker at the cemetery.
As a special treat, we piled into the car with the poles, and we would spend the evening with a line in the water, and watching the people with boats heading out to enjoy a moonlight cruise on Lake Erie. A can of pop by my side made me feel rich.
It is a sweet sound as the water laps against the pilings of the pier, a sound that can erase the cares of a hot summer day. Mom and Papa talk quietly, and we meet neighbors and friends out trying to catch a breath of cool air, just as we are. There is a special fellowship in a small town, and the saying that “everyone knows everyone” is more true than not.
I don’t recall if Papa caught anything that night. I don’t recall if I did either. I do remember the quiet and listening to the sounds of the earth – the water lapping softly on the pier, the gulls, always the gulls. I remember the gentle strength of my Papa’s voice. Some things never leave you, despite the years that come and go.
The sun cast a fiery glow in the western sky and I felt Papa’s strong arm around my waist as we looked at it together. We both knew the day was coming to a close, and we both felt the bittersweet twinge of trying to find just a few more minutes of daylight. The fiery glow, that’s what I recall. I suppose that’s what triggered the memory that I hold so dear. I smile at the thought and linger there.
Scooter and I look at each other, and in an instant he bounds out of the window and heads towards the front of the house. A birdie, he is certain, has called him away.
In an instant Papa is gone and just as quickly the little girl has vanished too.
Faintly in my mind I hear, “C’mon Shell, no more fishin’ today.”
The sunset has become a bridge if you will, binding the past to the present. Instead of one sweet memory, I now have two. I am convinced that even if it’s only for a moment each day, we need to visit the past and remind ourselves of those good and pleasant things.
*~*~*
There are buds on the trees now, and there is a faint wisp of spring that meets your nose these days. It’s a sweet and welcome sign. The earth has started to stir and come to life once more. The animals are waking up, and it’s not uncommon to see our very round skunk wandering merrily down the road. Unlike Gladys Taber, I have not named our skunk. Quite the opposite, I try to avoid him at all costs!!
The raccoon will be back in the Mountain Ash soon, no doubt helping himself to the cob of corn put out there for the squirrel. The circle of life begins again. Oh, it’s not spring, not yet, but it’s the promise of it. G-d will not leave us with winter. He has promised. Spring will come. Nature itself knows it, how can I doubt??
The girls – the now famous Sweet Potatoes – have started riding lessons and Cassandra especially is in her glory. The stables where they’re going are nestled in a little valley in the country. The owner is a pleasant man with a kindly heart and the patience it takes to guide little girls in the ways of horsemanship. Despite the fact that I haven’t been riding in a very long time (and no, I’m not saying how long) I felt very good that I managed to give Cassandra sound advice.
As follows:
Keep your back straight.
Keep your heels down.
Don’t step behind the horse!!
I felt that the latter was the most important of the three.
The first time there, Rebecca held her nose for a half hour. We didn’t even hide our laughter. I’m afraid we couldn’t. The owner finally told her that she would have to use both hands when she got on the horse. He smiled and then laughed, and Rebecca took her first full breath. It was a milestone.
As I watched Cassandra ride that first day, I suddenly saw past the present and before me sat a beautiful young woman, not the nine year old girl who giggles through the house. Confidant, assured and wise, with her back straight and heels down, there sat our Cassandra. Tears filled my eyes and Erik asked what was wrong. “She’s growing up too fast,” I said. We smiled at one another, and this time another strong arm slipped around my waist.
My Papa smiled. I’m sure of it.
Water laps against the pier, and a gentle horse carries a nine year old “young woman”. Spring buds appear, and the circle continues.
Bless you all my friends.
Love from Butternut Grove,
Shelley
“Perhaps, after all, our best thoughts come when we are alone. It is good to listen, not to voices but to the wind blowing, to the brook running cool over polished stones, to bees drowsy with the weight of pollen. If we attend to the music of the earth, we reach serenity. And, then, in some unexplained way, we share it with others.”
